How things work out.

I tried giving Mari some finger food today before her usual breakfast of pureed veg. A nice plate of sliced steamed carrots, pumpkin and some banana. She smeared all the pumpkin in to her clothes and sort of chucked the carrots around a bit and then picked up and tried to eat her plate. Yep. Then she smeared what was left of the pumpkin all over my clothes. Maybe the cooked veggies are a bit too slippery for her. I watched as she tried to grip the carrot but it kept slipping through her hands and she quickly became upset. So we settled down with a bowl of pumpkin puree and she was happy again.

Baby girl sure loves her food and will SCREAM if you try to take it away from her. Just like her mama.

NOM NOM NOM

That is the sound of my baby eating my food stuff. Today Mari snatched a piece of my lunch and proceeded to self feed herself the crust of my sandwich. You should have seen her stuffing her (tiny, adorable) face! Here I was mashing up her purees, making sure every bit of lump was gone and it turns out she's just as happy snacking on real live bread like a regular non-infant human being. I'm looking in to baby led weaning now but it's just ocurred to me, if BLW really is the way for me and Mari then haven't I just shelled out quite a bit of money for the hand grinder, baby food book, and feeding spoon... all that money, for nothing? (it's not that pricey but cash is kinda tight at the moment)

...

Trying not to think of it too much.

half a year.

I've just finished clearing out Mari's little closet. A tiny little newborn sized onesie was hidden at the bottom of it, and her old mitts and socks. It seems like she barely had time to wear them before she outgrew them. It's always bitter sweet clearing away her old clothes. I don't know how many times I'll be changing her wardrobe. Will it always tug at my heart? Another size outgrown, another step away from mama...

She turned 6 months old yesterday. A chunky, lively little girl with a mind of her own. She loves arching her back allll the way over and looking at the world upside down. When she's mad she stamps her little feet in vexation. Loves eating. And, this is so sweet, when I hold her up in front facing away from me she'll lean her head back and give me huge sloppy open mouthed kisses. I feel like my heart will burst sometimes.

Work is breaking my back. Juggling Mari and work is hard even if I'm working at home. Being apart from the Mr. all the time is really lonely. Sometimes I wish we can fast forward to a time when we are all together as a family but then I look at that tiny gumdrop face and I just wish time would stand still so I can kiss her, hold her, nurse her just a little bit longer.